Yesterday I drove Paul 2 hours to the Boston airport. I was already exhausted and still in my reeking bakery clothes that smell of burnt coffee and bacon grease. Paul wanted me to drive so that I wouldn't get confused as to how to return to Hanover. He was even sweet enough to print out 2 maps for me with driving directions TO the airport and FROM the airport. I think you know where this is going...
We arrived at Logan Airport on schedule. I used my LAX skills to navigate the terminal pull-ins (after missing the ramp for the terminals once entirely and had to circle back around). Kissed Paul goodbye in front of the Jet Blue terminal and confidently exited the airport...only to go SOUTH on the 93 fwy not NORTH like I was supposed to.
If you know Boston, it is a mess of underground tunnels and toll roads. I went South for a bit (there was no where to go! I was in tunnels!) and reached a toll booth. A wonderful dark-haired man with a 5 o'clock shadow said, "Hello Goaw-jus" as soon as I pulled up to hand him $3.50. I exclaimed, "I meant to go North!" He said, "Aw dan't worry. Yoaw goin' the right way." He took my money and said, "Behave up Nawth" I was like, "WHAT?" He smiled, "BEHAVE UP NAWTH!"
So cute. I love New England.
So he was right. The tunnel ended up circling around and I could catch the 93 North bound.
I had been driving an hour making EXTREMELY good time going about 80 mph. I reached Concord, NH where I was to connect to the 89 Fwy North and drive 50 minutes more to my house. I started to see signs for PLYMOUTH, NH. Huuuuh...
Well. It was dark. And apparently I never caught the 89 North. I drove 44 MILES North when I realized I WAS STILL ON the 93 FWY! (Which is SO stupid because on EVERY SINGLE MILE MARKER it tells you what fwy you're on and which direction you're headed.) I was so deep in thought, seeking through all the radio stations, (I heard the same Jason Miraz song 3 times on 3 different stations) and trying to pay attention to the dark forest all around me so I wouldn't hit a wandering moose that I didn't realize where I was going. At about 5:30 my bum was sore from sitting so long and I thought to myself, "I should be there by now." I whipped out the map Paul printed and saw where the town of Plymouth was. AN HOUR EAST OF MY HOUSE! OOOOH!
View Larger MapSo with no GPS to guide me to an alternate route, and no details on the printed map, I turned the car around and drove BACK 44 MILES to CONCORD. 88 Miles of my life. WASTED! I was so mad. It was just me and Delilah in the car. You know, the radio dj, "Deeelilaaah". The cops were out because of Veterans Day, but I didn't care. I was hauling butt. I didn't want to spend another minute in the car and by the time I reached Concord again, I'd have ANOTHER HOUR drive ahead of me!
I finally reached Concord and saw the stupid signs for the 89 North. I also saw Burlington Coat Factory which, as I hope you know, is more than great coats. So I decided I was sick of driving and I was going to stop. Never mind that I had 7 friends of mine waiting for me back in Hanover for a dinner and a movie night. I was already running late and I was pissed and embarrassed. So I did what any intelligent girl would do. I went shopping!!
SIDE BAR:
Ok. FIrst of all, you have to understand some things. 1.) We live in the middle of nowhere. We have a Wal-mart and a Khols where I live and that is HARDLY the Beverly Center OKAY?!
2.) We never drive the hour it takes to get to Concord to shop at Target or any of the "real" stores worth shopping. I was past due. And Paul encouraged it.
3.) In LA, driving an hour ain't no thang. Driving 12 miles and having it take an hour is not the same as driving 65 miles and having it take an hour. Here it wears you down! Especially if it's night and it's so PITCH BLACK outside and I NEED to drive the freeway with my brights on and, I am not joking, there are BEAR CROSSING signs ON THE FREEWAY!

I mean let's face it. This sign can be pretty shocking when the signs you're used to look like this:

And finally, #4.) I needed to stop for gas anyway. Might as well just "stop in" some stores while I'm in civilization! And running out of gas out here is WAAAY different than calling triple A on the 101, okay? #5.) I'm a girl and I need shoes. ESPECIALLY when I feel stupid.
So I grabbed two fabulous pairs of purple heels at only $14.99 a pair!
Feeling much better, I hopped in the car and in another hour I was home with my friends. Exhausted. But it was all worth it for these babies:

And this guy: